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Personality Type Two

Twos are also known as the

Assistant, Caretaker, Giver, Guardian Angel, Helper, Lover, Loving Person, Needy Giver, Nurturer, People Pleaser, Pleaser, Power behind the throne, Special Friend, Supporter

Overview

Values

love, altruism, friendship, warm feelings for others, religious faith, being needed, community

Main Motivation

To be loved

Twos like to see themselves as caring, loving people. They want to feel loved and appreciated by others. Twos believe that by being loving and kind to others, others will be kind and loving in return. Twos empathize strongly with others and put their needs first. They reject their own needs, feeling that they would be selfish to satisfy them.

Twos are seeking intimacy. They want to find a way to establish relationships in which they are close to others and deeply wanted. Twos believe that being kind and giving will open the door to such relationships. Twos believe that voicing their own needs will turn others away. Twos, therefore, are very indirect in the manner in which they express their needs. They truly want others to fulfil their needs, after all, they want to know others love them. Twos spend a great deal of time helping others, however, they have a hard time asking for help.

Average Levels

Level 4: Effusive Friend

Play the role of the Special Friend

Level 5: Possessive Intimate

Manipulate others by making others dependent on them

Level 6: Self-Important "Saint"

Undermine others by "proving" others are ungrateful

Average Twos see themselves as a special friend to others. They see others as people in need. Twos see themselves as having the ability to help others and feel obligated to do so. Twos are extremely well intentioned and for the most part, there deeds do please others. But Twos have a hard time recognizing their own emotional needs, especially their need to be appreciated.

Average Twos want others to depend on them - they need to be needed. Twos seek scenarios where they can fulfil the needs of others. Twos actively seek opportunities to be there for others. However, others don't always need their help. Twos begin to feel that others take them for granted. Twos give their time and resources to help and others don't appreciate it. Twos believe that the solution to this problem must be to show others that others need them.

Average Twos sometimes complain that others don't appreciate them. They feel that they love others more than others love them. Twos want to make certain that others see them as helpful and caring. Twos start to toot their own horns, reminding others of all the good things they have done. Twos take pride in their conduct and advertise to others the good they can do for others.

Average Twos feel that they are indispensable and that they must sacrifice themselves for others. They become the guilt-instilling martyr who needs to be needed. In fact, they are so desperate for appreciation that they will impose their help on others. They overcompensate by telling others how much others need them. Their self-importance and imposition tends to drive others away and makes others reject the Two -- one of their worst fears. Of course, the risk of rejection just motivates Twos to try even harder to be involved with others.

Unhealthy Levels

Level 7: Self-Deceptive Manipulator

Level 8: Coercive Dominator

Level 9: Psychosomatic Victim

If they haven't received the love they so desperately want, severely imbalanced Twos will become coercive and manipulative, demanding others love them. They flatter themselves and see themselves as "all good" while they play on others' guilt and make others feel indebted to them.

What leads Twos down the wrong path is the false belief that others will only appreciate them if they are all loving. Twos have a hard time feel good about themselves -- they need others to validate and affirm their value. Their self-image is based more upon the responses of others than on their own intrinsic value.

Healthy Levels

Level 1: Disinterested Altruist

Level 2: Caring Person

Become attached to values of kindness, compassion, loving

Level 3: Nurturing Helper

Feel good about themselves when they are loved and appreciated by other

Healthy Twos have let go of their forced love. Twos believe that they are the loving agent who comes in and helps people get back on their feet. Healthy Twos are incredibly generous, encouraging, and nurturing. They genuinely love and care for others, without expecting appreciation or gratitude. The act of helping is its own reward. Two's enormous empathy creates a real bond with others, making Twos delighted when they know others are happy.

At their best, Twos let go of the false belief that they are not allowed to take care of themselves. Healthy Twos recognize their own needs and believe that they deserve to treat themselves occasionally. They believe that good is still happening, even in their absence. Their generosity carries no expectation of return.

Their kind acts are examples of true unconditional love. Their love includes everyone-- including themselves.

Similarities to other Types

Common Traits with other Types
Twos seek Attention (like Threes and Fours)
Twos handle problems with a Positive Outlook approach (like Sevens and Nines)
Twos are Compliant to their inner rules (like Ones and Sixes)
Twos tend to Reject their own needs (like Fives and Eights)

Conflict Scenarios
Positive Outlook vs. Positive Outlook Twos in conflict with Twos, Sevens, Nines
Positive Outlook vs. Reactive Twos in conflict with Fours, Sixes, Eights
Positive Outlook vs. Competency  Twos in conflict with Ones, Threes, Fives

ultimedia



Watch a Two talk about her type
Dr. David Daniels describes Twos
Don Riso on Twos

Theme Songs

These "Theme Songs" express some of the most important issues of Type Twos.
  • service
  • love
  • happiness

Helping Hand

This piece by Amy Grant really emphasizes the natural desire for Twos to help out. Phrases like "Tell me what can I do today?", "Love is the only way ", "Take a look at your fellow man and tell me what can I do today" really speak to Twos.

Lyrics
Everybody needs a helping hand
Take a look at your fellow man
And tell me what can I do today
Everybody needs a helping out
If that ain't what it's all about
Tell me what
What can I do
What can I do today

We've all seen trouble from time to time
There is a mountain ahead
I've got no strength to climb, yeah
If you're feeling that you're strong
Reach out to me
I hope this journey won't take long
But won't you please
Have mercy

I'm talking 'bout the soul all alone
Needing the daily bread
Someplace to lay his head, yeah
And I'm talking about the neighbor on your street
Won't you look him in the eye
Take time to speak
That's mercy
Love one another
Sister and brother
Love is the only way

I’d like to teach the world to sing

Lyrics
I'd like to build the world a home
And furnish it with love
Grow apple trees and honey bees and snow-white turtle doves

I'd like to teach the world to sing
In perfect harmony
I'd like to hold it in my arms and keep it company
I'd like to see the world for once
All standing hand in hand
And hear them echo through the hills "Ah, peace throughout the land"

(That's the song I hear)
I'd like to teach the world to sing (that the world sings today)
In perfect harmony

I'd like to teach the world to sing
In perfect harmony

Id like to build the world a home
And furnish it with love
Grow apple trees and honey bees and snow-white turtle doves

All You Need is Love

by The Beatles

Lyrics
Love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love.
There's nothing you can do that can't be done.
Nothing you can sing that can't be sung.
Nothing you can say but you can learn how to play the game
It's easy.
There's nothing you can make that can't be made.
No one you can save that can't be saved.
Nothing you can do but you can learn how to be in time
It's easy.
All you need is love, all you need is love,
All you need is love, love, love is all you need.
Love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love.
All you need is love, all you need is love,
All you need is love, love, love is all you need.
There's nothing you can know that isn't known.
Nothing you can see that isn't shown.
Nowhere you can be that isn't where you're meant to be.
It's easy.
All you need is love, all you need is love,
All you need is love, love, love is all you need.
All you need is love (all together now)
All you need is love (everybody)
All you need is love, love, love is all you need.


Love Doesn't Ask Why

Performed by Celine Dion




Lyrics
Love doesn't ask why
It speaks from the heart
And never explains
Don't you know that
Love doesn't think twice
It can come all at once
Or whisper from a distance

Don't ask me if this feeling's right or wrong
It doesn't have to make much sense
It just has to be this strong
'Cause when you're in my arms I understand
We don't try to have a voice
When our hearts make the choices
There's no plan
It's in our hands

Love doesn't ask why
It speaks from the heart
And never explains
Don't you know that
Love doesn't think twice
It can come all at once
Or whisper from a distance

Now I can feel what you're afraid to say
If you give your soul to me
Will you give too much away
We can't let this moment pass us by
Can't question this chance
Or expect any answers
We can try
But love doesn't ask you why

[Instrumental]

So let's take what we found
And wrap it around us
Love doesn't ask why
It speaks from the heart
And never explains
Don't you know that
Love doesn't think twice
It can come all at once
Or whisper from a distance
Love doesn't ask why


I'm Free


Performed by John Secada
This upbeat song is appropriate for all of the Positive Outlook types.


Lyrics


Do you see what I see
A rainbow shining over us
In the middle of a hopeless storm
Sometimes I'm blinded by my feelings
And I can't see beyond my troubled mind
Afraid of what I'll find
The story of our lives
But there's tomorrow.

[Chorus]
Cause I'm free, I'm free
And things are only as important
As I want them to be
We'll have a breath of sunshine
When the rain goes away
I pray, I pray.


Do you need a friend right now
In the road that you're going to
If you get lost just call me I'll be there
Yes I'll be right there
Cause though I may not have the answer
At least I know what I'm looking for.

Yes I can do without sorrow
There's a day after tomorrow
So I'm leaving behind.

[Chorus]
I'm free, I'm free
And things are only as important
As I want them to be
We'll have a breath of sunshine
When the rain goes away
I pray, I pray.


And if you want to share my dreams
Well all you have to do is say it, say it
Let me hear you loud and clear
Cause I need you if you wanna be, if you wanna be.

Do you see what I see
A rainbow shining over us
In the middle of a hopeless storm
We'll be safe and warm.

[Repeat chorus]